


unspoken

by watergator (orphan_account)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-23
Updated: 2017-07-23
Packaged: 2018-12-05 21:55:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,202
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11586966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/watergator
Summary: Keith doesn't love Lance anymore, and Lance knows that; he just wishes he could understand why





	unspoken

**Author's Note:**

> spoiler tags at the end of this so if you wanna read those tags im putting them at the end for those who want to avoid spoilers

It was hard to figure out what was wrong when only one person would even try to communicate to the other.  
Lance remembers what it felt like to fall in love with Keith; he fell in love with his eyes, then his smile, then his body, eventually his laugh and then with all of him all at once.  
It had taken time, it had taken a long, gruelling process but it was always there in the back of their minds, even when they were bickering like children.  
Time had passed, battles had been fought, feelings had been shared and eventually there was time to actually _be_ in love.  
It was a happy, beautiful love.  
They had returned to Earth; broken and tired, but together.

But something had changed.  
Lance had noticed how cold and distant Keith had become the last few weeks – not that it was anything new, Lance had gotten used to his boyfriend being quiet and distant, opening himself up and talking about feelings wasn’t exactly his favourite thing in the world – but nonetheless, Lance had always found a way to pour his heart out to him.  
But this time it was different.

They would still sleep in the same bed, but they hardly touched. Lance tried a few times to move closer, rest his head on his chest like he used to, but instead of his boyfriend wrapping his arms around him, pulling him closer like they used to, Keith lay still on his back; still like wood, unmoving – almost no emotion, and soon, after a while, Lance got the hint that he didn’t want to be snuggled with.  
So instead, they slept back to back, and instead of the warmth that used to engulf Lance at night – it was cold and icy. 

Lance couldn’t handle the silence, how Keith would completely ignore him, his eyes not even meeting his anymore. Those eyes he fell in love with had gone cold, they weren’t the same, and Lance couldn’t understand why.  
They would usually wake in the morning, lazily roll out of bed and make breakfast together, but as of late, Keith would just lay in bed until mid-day.

Lance would offer breakfast in bed, hoping the gesture could spark something, but the cold, hard silence would go right through him, and again, Lance stopped trying.  
So he stood in the kitchen alone, not even really hungry, but managed to pour himself a bowl of cereal to eat by himself, when he noticed the dishes that had piled up in the sink and he sighed.

_How had things gotten so shitty so quickly?_

It was like being stuck on a loop. Lance would ask Keith something, Keith would ignore him and Lance would retreat to another room of their house to cry silently - the house they bought together, the one they decided would be a forever home, the house they once called home but now felt like a prison cell.

Lance decided one night, when Keith was curled up on one side of the sofa, Lance the other, to be brave and confront his boyfriend that wasn’t exactly his boyfriend anymore.  
“What happened to us?” Lance spoke, his voice was shaky, but Keith continued to blink hazily at the TV screen. 

“Keith,” Lance whispered, “Keith, please talk to me” he spoke, his voice coming out small and watery.

He saw the boy flinch, almost tense slightly, and he braced himself for an answer, for tears, for anything – but again, he was met with a heavy silence, and it made Lance want to scream.

But he couldn’t. 

Because he still loved Keith, he still held him in his heart, even after all of this – he knew he could figure this out. He just had to keep trying.  
After everything, after all they had been through, to the ends of the universe and back, Lance could fix this – he just had to figure out what it was that was broken.

Things didn’t change, Lance would awaken, hoping that things would take a turn and Keith would love him again, but nothing ever did change, it was the same.

Except one thing.

Sometimes Lance would awaken in the night, early hours of the morning to find the space next to him empty. The first few times it happened, Lance thought that perhaps he was getting a drink, or going to the bathroom, but when he realised that Keith wasn’t coming to bed anymore, and the blanket that was strewn across the sofa, the pillow on the arm of it – the breath seemed to catch in this throat, because they never slept separately.

“God, I can’t even sleep in the same bed anymore” Keith said one afternoon.

Lance blinked up from his seat where he ate his lunch, the other end of the table, instead of his usual seat next to Keith.

It was the first time in what felt like forever that he had heard his voice – it sounded so raw and scratchy, and it made Lance want to burst into tears and the very sound of it, because it was the first glimmer of his boyfriend in weeks. It was the only part of him he’d been able to have in such a long time.

Lance stayed silent for a while, Keith just blinked at his untouched food, eyes still not meeting his, when Lance decided to test the waters,

“What’s wrong with us?” he spoke.

Silence. Quiet. _Nothing._

Lance sucked in a breath, watching Keith blink at his food, concentrating on it like it was the most important thing in the world, before he stood suddenly, chair legs scraping against the wooden floor, tears now rolling down his cheeks, muttering a very watery, “Fuck” before he left.

Lance let silent tears dribble down his face as he sat at the table. The room felt so cold and empty.  
His heart physically hurt, he didn’t realise it was even possible, he remembers his mother telling him how heartbreak could kill a person, but he never really thought it was real – especially because of how in love he was in with Keith.

Things only went downhill from there, and Lance wonders if it was because of the table incident but since then, he watches Keith retreat to their bathroom and stay in there for hours.  
He never dares to go in after him, he isn’t sure what’s pushing boundaries - not anymore, he feels like he hardly knows him anymore, but one afternoon, it’s raining outside, hard and heavy, when Lance hears a quiet sob.

He’s seen Keith cry, countless times, a billion and one times when they would cry into each other – being defenders of the universe was never easy, but they could always count on each other to be a shoulder to, literally, cry on.  
But never had he seen Keith lock himself away and cry in private.

The door is unlocked, which Lance thinks is weird, and he sees Keith curled up in a small ball on the bathroom floor, sobs racking his body.  
Lance doesn’t care if Keith hates his blood, or doesn’t want to be touched by him, because instinct takes over and he’s crouching beside him, engulfing him with all the strength he has, hand on his back as Keith cries in pain.  
It goes on for hours, they don’t talk, Lance soothes him and Keith hiccups his way through sobs, and they stay on the bathroom floor for what feels like an eternity until Keith seems to calm down. Lance doesn’t let go, he doesn’t pull away or loosen his grip around his body.  
Not even when he hears his name, pass through Keith’s lips.

“Lance”

He almost misses it, it’s so quiet and meek, but it’s there.  
And Lance would think it’s progress, if he were to ignore the fact that the whole time in the bathroom, Keith didn’t lean into the embrace once.

He wishes that they went to bed together that night, rain pitter-pattering against the roof, wrapped up in each other’s arms, offering small whispers of comfort – totally and utterly in love.

But they don’t.

Keith sleeps on the sofa and Lance cries himself to sleep.

There’s a change in pace a few days later. Keith is in the kitchen washing the dishes that had gone from a pile to a mountain in a matter of days.  
Lance offered to help but was again, met with silence, so instead, he sits at the table, head in his hands, watching his boyfriend slowly wash each cup and plate, slowly and silently.  
He wishes he would just say something, it’s getting to him now, the anger.

He loves Keith, of course he does, but it frustrates him.  
How can he fix something he doesn’t know is broken? It’s unfair and selfish of Keith, he thinks.

It’s so unfair but he can’t bring himself to start an argument, because screaming escalates things and he’s not so sure he’s up for that. 

Keith is drying a plate with an old rag when suddenly it slips from his hands. Lance flinches, not sure why, almost instinct to catch it, but it hits the floor, smashing into a million tiny pieces.

The sound seems to echo throughout the empty, cold house, and as Lance is moving, not needing to offer to help, he notices Keith hasn’t even moved.

Lance moves slowly towards him, small delicate steps until he is beside him.

“Keith?” he asks, voice louder than expected and slowly reaches his hand up until it reaches his back between his shoulder blades.

That’s when he screams.

He’s screaming, ripping through his lungs, slowly sinking to the floor, rag still in his hands.  
Lance flinches, shocked for a second, heart beating in his chest because _he doesn’t fucking know what to do._

Lance has never heard him like this – this isn’t frustration or anger. This sounds like heartbreak.

He’s still crying, and Lance must have missed him pulling out his phone because he’s calling someone but Lance can’t hear him because of the blood pounding in his head.

But he lets out a breath he doesn’t realise he’s holding when the front door opens with force, hitting the wall as Hunk bursts through looking flustered.

Lance stands up, going to greet his friend but Hunk runs past him to be beside Keith.  
He gets it, Hunk’s just as worried as he is.

Lance tries to speak but his voice is caught in his throat and there’s tears down his cheeks – he doesn’t remember crying.

“Keith?” Hunk asks, he’s stopped screaming now and is instead sobbing again.

Lance goes to tell him, that it’s no use – that he would reply but is stopped when Keith speaks.

“I can’t do this anymore” he cries, voice dripping in hurt.

Lance’s heart sinks, feeling as if it’s in his stomach. 

_What did he do wrong?_

“I know, I know” Hunk soothes him, he’s on his knees, a hand on his shoulder.

Lance wants to yell – tell Hunk it’s none of his business, that he shouldn’t being saying stuff like that, not when he’s right here in front of them.

But his words dry up when Keith whimpers,  
“I miss him so much”

It doesn’t make sense, and Lance frowns,  
“Keith, I’m right here” he says, keeping his tone soft, but it goes unnoticed when Hunk talks,

“I know you do, we all do” 

Hunk is comforting Keith now, much like Lance did on the bathroom floor those few nights ago – but this time Keith is leaning into him and it hurts his heart so much to watch.

Lance is now on his knees next to the two boys, amongst the broken pieces of the plate, as Keith pulls away, tears and snot and dribble smeared over his face, eyes red and puffy from his tears,

“I miss him so fucking much”

Lance cries audibly this time because he doesn’t understand, it doesn’t make any sense, he feels like he’s missing out on something because he’s so lost.

“Keith I’m right here” he cries, reaching to put his hand on his shoulder, when Keith suddenly shivers and whispers sadly,

“I can almost feel him – sometimes hear him”

Lance’s blood runs cold. He can’t speak.

“I know, Keith” Hunk says, his own tears welling up now.

Lance suddenly feels very distant.

“How do I do this?” Keith asks, those big beautiful eyes look so tired.

“Dealing with the death of a loved one isn’t easy, Keith” Hunk says, but it sounds like it’s coming from underwater.

He’s sure he’s floating away somewhere.

“I know” Keith sniffs, “I just want him back”

Lance can’t seem to ground himself, he wants to stay and tell him he loves him but Keith beats him to the punch,

“I love him” he tells Hunk through a sob and it seems to go straight through Lance’s chest, almost electrifying him.

He tries to scream, to yell, to cry; to say something, but nothing comes out and he’s drifting away, somewhere bright and airy.  
He tries to call out for him but he’s too far away, and it’s too late, he can’t hear or see anymore and his words go unspoken.

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING: MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH


End file.
